time

time with tiny humans is strange. it's bittersweet. because it's hard. and simple. it's fun. and it's challenging. it's invigorating and it's exhausting.

in some moments i can't hurry time enough. i want it to be over. i want it to end. {teething at 2 am for example}.

and in the next moment my heart hurts to watch time pass. i want it to freeze. never let another second go by.

i once heard someone say, 'don't wish your life away'. and i try to keep that in the forefront of my mind. i try to be patient. in the moment. i try to breath it all in. remember ever detail. enjoy the experience.

but it's hard. it's hard to be selfless. patient. present.

and so i just try my best. but some nights i go to bed. and feel guilty. and i remind myself that tomorrow is a new day. tomorrow i will try harder.

and in mere months, i will look back at this stage with great fondness. and surely my heart will ache. and wish for nothing more than these 'simple times'.

my eyes are teary.