Thursday, May 17, 2012


i loved the idea of teleporting while reading The Time Traveler's Wife. other than that, it's to sci fi for my brain.

although somehow while listening to the radio, which is actually very rare for me, i was instantly teleported back to 9th grade. when an overly played sublime song came on. can we give up on that band yet? i actually kinda hate them. it just represents this entirely awkward stage in my life. my first year of high school. my first boyfriend. my first break up... which sounds more dramatic than it was.

and as i think about it, all these silly details come back. and it's almost too embarrassing to write about. to admit to. the mini romance that happened more in my head than in real life. the break up over the phone. me returning to the kitchen counter afterwards and watching my mom cook dinner. like nothing happened. i don't even think i told her.

i had this fortune from a cookie. and it said something like 'your greatest wish will come true'. and i would look at it everyday after that phone call. him changing his mind was the wish. i believed that. and every night as i turned off my lights i would read that fortune. i wondered when it would happen. when the wish would come true. you know... since fortune cookie fortunes ALWAYS come true. so silly. so, so silly. i know.

the greatest wish wasn't for him to change his mind really. it was to be loved. and by him not changing his mind left my life open to bigger and better things.

when i look at my life today my greatest wish{es} have come true. i was just hasty back in 9th grade. i didn't have faith in time.

i guess the moral of the story is like that line from a country song,
'sometimes i thank god for unanswered prayers'

and sublime songs are outdated.

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